Five Seasons of Podcast Introductions
Season 1:
“Hello, my name is Annie Altman and I’ve spent my life on a quest for true shit. So far I’ve learned that “the truth hurts” is some true shit, and that there is no ultimate true shit because my truth is different from someone else’s truth and my truth now is different from my truth a year ago.
Some true shit that has held up over time: 1) be honest, the true shit will come out eventually and lying only complicates things 2) the truth is simple and lies are complicated 3) be kind and treat people how you want to be treated. If you are uninterested in someone else imposing their true shit onto you, do your best to be mindful of imposing your true shit onto others. This show is basically an opportunity for me to shoot the shit about things I want to shoot the shit about with people I want to shoot the shit with. Thanks for listening to me practice humaning.”
Season 2:
“Hello and welcome to The Annie Altman Show, the podcast formerly known as True Shit. My name is Annie Altman and I really enjoy asking people questions about what this whole being human experience is like for them. This podcast is field research for The HumAnnie, an interactive stand-up comedy musical philosophy show about how no one ever fully knows how to be a human being.
If you’re listening to this now, you’re fortunate enough to choose your truth. I choose to believe that objectivity is the sum of subjectivities, meaning humans collectively create truth.”
Season 3:
“Hello and welcome to The Annie Altman Show The Podcast, Season 3. The Annie Altman Show Projects are field mesearch for The HumAnnie, an interactive stand up comedy musical philosophy show — from the perspective of a human named Annie, hey it’s me. The HumAnnie is about how no one every fully “figures out” how to human, how there’s 10 “C” themes of the human experience connected by the C theme of connection, and how openly discussing these themes is part of maximizing resource equity and minimizing human suffering. Hurt people hurt people, and everybody hurts sometimes. Acknowledging basic humans needs as human rights helps everyone.
Philosophizing is at the top of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, and so is a privileged activity I get to engage in because my foundational needs for food, water, and shelter are consistently met. I offer The HumAnnie 10 C themes of the human experience as a language-based-reasoning reminder that we are all more similar than we are different, shown by the connected life themes we all seem to encounter. I use the 10 Cs to check in with my own life, sometimes visualizing where I feel I’m at with one of them on the bell curve distribution, which is a rotated letter C. C is also the speed of light constant, which I find pretty cool! Science and spirituality are also more similar than they are different, both serving to benefit humanity — pick your faith.We’re all humans reminding each other how to human, making this human thing up as we human along. Life is paradox.
The 10 Cs are: consciousness, choice, change, compassion, communication, community, creation, charge, curiosity, and courage.”
Season 4:
“Hello and welcome to The Annie Altman Show The Podcast, Season 4. The Annie Altman Show Projects are field mesearch for The HumAnnie, an interactive stand up comedy musical philosophy show — from the perspective of a human named Annie, hey it’s me. The HumAnnie is about how no one every fully “figures out” how to human, how there’s 10 “C” themes of the human experience connected by the C theme of connection, and how openly discussing these themes is part of maximizing resource equity and minimizing human suffering.”
Season 5:
“The Annie Altman Show Podcast and other projects are field mesearch for the The HumAnnie — hey, it’s Annie! Please check out and share the website, Patreon, and Etsy to help support these projects and mySelf project. The HumAnnie is a one woman show about how no one ever fully figures out how to be a human being, how there’s themes of the human being experience organized into ten C words connected by the theme of connection, and how discussing these themes we all experience somehow is my best idea to contribute to minimizing unnecessary human suffering through maximizing resource equity. That was a lot of words.
Maybe note when you hear the words connection, consciousness, choice, change, compassion, communication, community, creation, charge, curiosity, and/or courage in this episode. That’s also a lot of words. Here’s some more.”
